Monday, December 22, 2008
Why Jesus is Better Than Santa Claus
Santa Claus lives at the North Pole...
JESUS is everywhere.
Santa Claus rides in a sleigh...
JESUS rides on the wind and walks on the water.
Santa Claus comes but once a year...
JESUS is an ever present help.
Santa Claus fills your stockings with goodies...
JESUS supplies all your needs.
Santa Claus comes down your chimney uninvited... JESUS stands at your door and knocks, and then enters your heart when invited.
You have to wait in line to see Santa Claus...
JESUS is as close as the mention of His name.
Santa Claus lets you sit on his lap...
JESUS lets you rest in His arms.
Santa Claus doesn't know your name, all he can say is "Hi little boy (or girl,) what's your name?"...
JESUS knew our name before we did. Not only does He know our name, He knows our address too. He knows our history and future and He even knows how many hairs are on our heads.
Santa Claus has a belly like a bowl full of jelly...
JESUS has a heart full of love.
All Santa Claus can offer is HO HO HO...
JESUS offers health, help and hope.
Santa Claus says "You better not cry"...
JESUS says "Cast all your cares on me for I care for you."
Santa's little helpers make toys...
JESUS makes new life, mends wounded hearts, repairs broken homes and builds mansions.
Santa Claus is a "jolly old elf"...
JESUS is the King of Kings.
Santa Claus may make you chuckle but...
JESUS gives you joy that is your strength.
While Santa Claus puts gifts under your tree...
JESUS became our gift and died on a tree.
Fifty Dollars is Fifty Dollars!
Morris and his wife Esther went to the state fair every year, and every year Morris would say, 'Esther,I'd like to ride in that helicopter.'
Esther always replied, 'I know Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars'
One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and Morris said, 'Esther, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance.'
To this, Esther replied, 'Morris that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.'
The pilot overheard the couple and said, 'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.'
Morris and Esther agreed and up they went. The pilot did all kinds of fancy maneuvers, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word.
When they landed, the pilot turned to Morris and said, 'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Morris replied, 'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Esther fell out, but you know, fifty dollars is fifty dollars!'
The Idiot Quote of the Century
- Barack Obama
Men are so easy
1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exter minator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate
WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls
AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes
IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:
54. Never to forget:
* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes
HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1 Show up naked
2. Bring food and beer
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Date night pie
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
The woes of exercising
I started exercising 2 days ago (wish I could say at least a week) and I am already pooped out. My legs are sore, I woke up with a Charlie horse. I just feel slumpy, but even worse, I feel like the one on the right when among friends:
I used to exercise all the time before I was married. I loved it. Why do I always have to drag myself out the door before going?? I think the movies and snack food, like peanut butter crackers, fun fruits and the desire to chill/talk with Jared have replaced my love for exercising.
Thankfully, Jared has started to exercise. I think he is noticing the big bump I have on my abs (no, I am not pregnant). He kicks me out of the house, while he stays indoors and does his g-ball exercises. He loves it. It involves a basketball-looking ball and you swing it all around you in a, supposedly, graceful manner, and call it exercise. I, on the other hand, enjoy the outdoors and prefer to feel good about myself by hitting the pavement and seeing how far I can go. Last night, after I was done, I was proud at how far I had gone. I estimated it to be about 1.5 miles, running without stopping.
So, in the end, (the next day), I feel pretty good about myself. I feel like I've accomplished something. Granted, I have been hobbling around today and I moan when I pick up Sam, but it's the feeling inside. It's that pat-on-the-back feeling good. I think I will keep doing it.
Monday, October 6, 2008
Kindness pays
General Conference
Rachel looking at our pictures from Hawaii and Jared watching Sam.
I loved President Eryings talk of unity. He talked about how we need to look for similarities in others who believe differently than us. He said that children of God have more similarities than differences. I think it is a call for us to love those of other faiths and to treat those differences with respect and love. He used the term of being a "peacemaker" when talking to other individuals, whether it being our spouses, family, friends, or nonmembers. I have seen many marriages decline due to the pride of one or both spouse always wanting to be right and never seeming to agree.
I thought he spoke to me on the criticizing of others. He said we should always speak good of one another. He said, "I can promise you a feeling of peace and joy when you speak generously of others... You will feel unity...it will be because the Lord will let you feel his appreciation for choosing to step away from the possibility of sowing seeds of disunity." I have felt both the feeling of peace come as I have spoken well of others and the feelings of regret and disunity as I have spoken unwell of others. I resolved to change my view and to always seek and look for the good in each one of us (including myself) and to be a "peacemaker."
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Sam's bedroom
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Organizing the pantry
I couldn't believe there was a floor underneath all that!
Well, here is the final product. Yeah!
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Sam at 4 months
Joys, Fears, and Obsessions
-renting a redbox movie, buying cheetos, and having a great date night with Jared
-Waking Sam up in the morning to see him with the biggest smile ever.
-Visiting new sites.
3 Fears:
-Getting in a car crash
-Getting really heavy
-being a failure in life
3 Obsessions
-Throwing Jared's stuff away (the saver, while I am the tosser) to have a clean house
-watching tv
- eating right-salads daily, having breakfast (which consists of a malt-o-meal type of gound flax, sesame, and pumpkin seeds blended with cottage cheese and applesauce)